FORGIVE......

FORGIVE..... is the word that is easy to spell,remember, understand
but difficult to put into action......

gotten a call on fri.... dad said grandpa is surviving on machine in the hospital.
he may not be able to make it through........
the news shocked me.... "wat happen" was the question that came out of my mind...
there is no signs no nothin.......

when i came back frm korea he was stayin wif us.....
all the drama mama happened and he moved out......
i was so angry so so so angry wif him........all the anger just gotten into me that i forgot
i forgot he used to dote on us when we were young.......

he used to feed me butter and told us its healthy to occasional take some butter
he used to give us each S$2 when we visit him during the weekend
he used to give me apples and i was so greedy that i got myself choked on one
he helped to pull out my sis shaky tooth causing another one to shake too
he bought us toys and tibits

becos of my anger i lost all the good memories of him and choose to remember the bad things he did..... i wasnt forgiving enough....

i refused to see him when he was at the home
i still thought he deserved it
i wasnt forgiving enough.......... and i regretted it

i saw him 2 nites ago.... he changed...
he no longer used to be the grandpa that i am angry wif.....
he became so weak.... he's surviving on the machine.....
i couldnt bear to look at him... i regretted.....
i shld b more forgiving...... was so childish.......

i still remembered he smiled and said thank you to me when i passed him the cup of milo for his teabreak when i just came back frm korea.........

today the doc said he's recovering slowly.......
drifting in n out of coma.......openin his eyes when we called him
it was such a relief....... i hope god give me a second chance....
i promise to be more forgivin..... n i jus wan to tell him

Ah gong, I am sorry.........