Happy NEW year to all my families and friends out there!
Let's wish that year 2009 will be a better one for all of us....
Yes.... Went through friends' blogs...... all penning down wat they have achieved in 2008 and their 2009 resolutions etc..... So was running thru my head on what i had done in 2008 and wat i wan in 2009..... GUESS wat?! NOTHING!!! BLANK!!!
2008 wasnt a good year for me.... I GUESS slightly suffering depression in the early of the year... i lost 2 kins.... One of whom is my grandfather whom i always respected since young....Sometimes I REALLY miss him now that he is not around....
First of all, I was back in Sg cos my dad decided tat i shld spend my CNY with my family and in the meanwhile I worked for the $ to continue my studies in Korea....... The approx. 4months in Sg was not paradise i shld say... Though my family and friends were around, I feel so empty and lonely...(i guess its the depression mood tat is working on me tat time) Singapore dun seem to be like my home anymore?! I minimised meeting up with friends so I can save on the money to use in Korea..... HOW SILLY.....I always blamed my dad for asking me back cos if not for the break in between I would have graduated already...
So all the gar-rang show and stuff that happened in my life..... TEARS n stuff....... But again I thanked my dad for insisting that i shld be back so at least i can see my grandpa for the last time..... I guessed I going MAD one day, with spilting personalities.......
Later half of the year, back in Korea, in school with new friends etc.... old friends left...My sis in Korea for work and we went to Pusan for sightseeing etc... Finally friends became lesser and lesser as I progressed into another level......But still I like and enjoy Korea....Not because Junwoo is here but because I know I can take care of myself and need not to be worry of other tings except how I can spend my money wisely.... Maybe because I am trying to escape... escape from reality.... Or simply been selfish.....Or perhaps I was borned a KOreAN in my LAST life...
I havent had any plans for 2008 except to get back to Korea as soon as possible... Nothing fruitful in my memory of 2008. Except remembering that I was crying myself to bed so frequent that I dun even know I have so much TEARS............BT HEY thank god, i pull thru 2008 despite the depression.... GUESS the motivation was to be back in KOREA...
I still remembered talking to a classmate of mine aged 60plus.... He asked me since I like Korea so much why not find a job in Korea... I told him my difficulties and stuff and this was wat he told me and I still remembered "Irin, why are you been so hard on urself?? Things will work out themselves. Why shld u worry?"
Am I being too hard on myself? YUP maybe I tink....
I read Cat's blog.... THANKS Cat for thoughts of fund raising and stuff.... I really appreciate and am touched by that thought of yours.... In fact in tears now.... I too am glad to be able to get to know Ed and be able to show u guys ard in KOrea, the place that I AM IN LOVE in and hopefully you nw know why I like KOrea so much.... But I tink I might have to give up my dream and go back to reality for the time being... I hate that I have to do that bt at least I am not ashame to at least say I HAD TRIED for it before in my life and had a CHANCE to.
ONCE again taking the opportunities to thanks all those who had supported my dream till this far in either monetary form (my dad, sis sponsors), mental strength (Junwoo, ex-sentosians, tiff), materials (jolene for sponsorin ur laptop, LJ for lending me the money for VISA application), physical strength (ah han for helping me with my luggages, cat and my cousin for bringing my stuff back), food supplies (cat, ed, my MUM n my cousin) or cosy hm supplies (the auntie who used to work in our boarding hse).
If not for you I wont b here typing this post... THANK YOU AND I LOVE U ALL!!!!!!! 2008's a history, let's look forward to a better 2009!
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